November 2011 Newsletter

For those of us in the U.S., this is the week we celebrate Thanksgiving and many of us spend quality time with our families. Sometimes, that results in conversations that we would rather avoid. That's why this month's newsletter focuses on how to exit a conversation both in meetings and casual conversations.  

Hopefully, you won't have to use these techniques this week, but if you do, let me know how it goes.

Conversations are critical to building relationships, but sometimes it's also important to end a conversation. Running timely meetings, successful networking and getting "Chatty Cathy" back to her desk so you can work require friendly conversation control.

Here's a three-step process to gracefully control and exit a conversation.

1. Interject. To take friendly control of a conversation, you must be the person talking. Listen carefully and make an opening to interject a thought. Consider these options:

In a meeting: "You raise an interesting point," or "Thanks for bringing that to our attention."

While networking or in conversation: "That's a funny story," "I had no idea making widgets was so complicated," or "That sounds interesting."

2. Redirect. Once you're speaking, redirect the conversation to another topic or engage another person to change the tone of the conversation.

In a meeting: "Let's put that idea in the parking lot for now," "Let's continue this conversation after the meeting," or "Jim has been working on that. Jim, can you give us an update from your committee?"

While networking or in conversation: "Have you ever noticed," or "That reminds me of ... (then change the subject)," or "Sally, how was your vacation in Spain?"

3. Disconnect. Clearly end the conversation or move on to the next topic or activity.

In a meeting: "In the interest of time, let's move to the next item on our agenda," or "Can you come up with some recommendations and share them with the task force?"

While networking or in conversation: If redirecting the conversation does not work you may have to disconnect by leaving. "It's been really nice meeting you. Enjoy the rest of the event." (Shake hands and leave.) Or, "I'm glad we had a chance to catch up. I've got to grab a bite to eat /get back to work, so let's talk later."

This technique takes practice. If you're speaking with someone who's determined to keep a conversation going, you may have to repeat the process. Think of the times when you have the most difficulty ending a conversation. Then prepare a few lines in advance that will help you interject, redirect and disconnect. Your meetings will be better, your conversations more enjoyable and you'll be more productive.

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 © 2011 Chakisse Newton. All Rights Reserved.